got no inspiration on what to write today. but must write something lest my readers think i'm comatose and leave my site for good. thought of using two wood blocks to imitate ah pek's kamasutra positions (pls refer to http://malaysian-ahpek.blogspot.com/2006/02/sexual-position-aka-fuckosition.html)(got that idea while playing wooden jengga with kor-kor - sigh! you guys are starting to corrupt my normal daily life too!). but it is not my style lah. so, what i dwell on?
i just got thinking today, "why my life like that one?". there must be a principle of science that newton has forgotten to say, "if lenglui like" then it is followed by "sure don't have" and "if lenglui want", the principle dictates that "sure can't get".
Rule No.1: If there is a pair of shoes that lenglui has her eyes on (and she doesn't usually go crazy over any shoes), then there will no stock left of her shoe size.
Rule No. 2: If there is any cute top/skirt/dress/pants that lenglui likes, then there will be no correct size. so, either she has to settle for smaller size (and her boobs will be squeezed out from her armpit and cleavage) or she has to go for a larger size (and she will look like some auntie who wears second-hand clothes)
Rule No. 3: if there is any guy who looks twice at her, it must be some hum sup, wui sor, blue-collar, crude, evil looking guy (who looks more like a rapist then a fine gentleman who is appreciative of the opposite sex and makes her fear for her life)
Rule No. 4: if there is some old old friend that she is not so keen to meet up with again, fate will definitely give them a chance to bump into each other. it goes to reason that if there is someone that she will give an arm and a leg to catch a glimpse of again, she will never ever lay her sight on that person again for the rest of her life.
Rule No. 5: if she says she wants to go swimming (which is another rareeeeeee occasion) the wind and rain will suddenly come out from nowhere. so, people, if you guys need the rain for any special reason, just get ms lenglui to go for a swim. more effective than a bomoh or the rain dance.
Rule No. 6: if she is goes away on vacation, there is a 99.9999% that she will fall sick. hence, if in australia and there is fresh lobster at very reasonable prices, it stands to reason that she will succumb to flu and lose her taste buds. if in langkawi, she will catch a fever and has to stay away from under the sun.
love to entertain you guys further on the newly found rules of physics but i got to run. till next time........but there is a 99.99999% chance that the computer will break down when lenglui wants to log in.
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4 comments:
this, my dear mslenglui, is called karma.
next time don't plan ahead. do things on the umpulse. then you beat the authorities up there at their own game.
also known as murphy's law.
Poor dear mslenglui, u think of the 'ifs' negatively too much.
Why do you need your Rule No. 1 - 6 and 7(the computer) "ifs" take
control over you.
Solution:
Easy, take away the 'If' in the beginning of the sentence and the 'No' in the second part of that sentence. Walla, all will be perfect, right!
msCN will be my future name.
actually I am not msCN
I am 'a friend'
Ah Pek: Karma ah? aiyoh, then it must mean that i have done something very bad in my past life to deserve this :( cannot beat the higher authorities lah. lose lose game. even on impulse lenglui say want to swim, haiyoh, the dark clouds come faster that you can say "what the....!" i can pretend i don't like something lah, and see if the bog boss really knows i want it sooooo bad...try and see ah. let you know how it turns out.
seng kor: wahhhhhh! you so learned lah. cleverrrr boy ah *batting eyelashes and smile damn hiao*
msCN: wah! rhyme somemore. keng ah! the rules not for me to say or break lah. it wants to happen. i can take away the ifs and the nos but it still happens!!!!! so, i "fah". anything also can, don't have also nevermind. whatever lah :) thank you for "pong charn" my blog ah. but keep secret ah. nanti, habis loh, everybody want a piece of ms lenglui.
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