Friday, May 26, 2006

hello?




ring ring.....*picks up the phone*

hellooo....

hi.......how are you?..........

erm.........

i bet you get many phone calls that begin like this and yet, there i was scratching my head, wondering how to answer that question.

so, do you want me to launch into the entire thesis of what has been happening to me lately, how things are bugging me, how i have been unable to function normally and how i am so desperately trying to adjust back to normal life, how i have been contemplating the appropriate ways to end my life, the whole works. you know, that may take quite a while. (this is just an example and not meant to portray my present mental status :-p)

or do you expect me to answer 'fine', which kind of makes the question redundant then.

tell me, how am i supposed to answer a question like this?

erm....actually i had a very close brush with the law yesterday and i was taken to the police station, which incidentally is where i am now. by the way, can you help to post bail?

and if i do go on and on about how i am really doing, there is a very high likelihood that the caller will at one point forget the real reason he is calling.

er.......actually i called you for........erm........ar..........it's for.......................hmmmm...........................i think i need to call you back on that. and then the cycle continues when he calls back again.

so, a quick 'fine' and 'i called you for......blah blah blah'. that will do, right? not very sincere, not the exact thruth, but for the sake of expediency, it will have to do for now. i mean, if you are concerned to know how i am really doing, come visit me and find out for yourself. *sticks tongue out*

12 comments:

Admin said...

tut. tut... your mood is acting up again..

sengkor said...

can prease speak engrish..?

me said...

dear ah pek: :-) bo lah. really. my mood is good. just a cynical look at a question that has always been posed to me. do i be politically correct or thruthful?

dear seng kor: soli, what talking yew? i am the speerking engrish mah. *grins* are you feeling better?

Wuching said...

ppl just wanna b polite mah, no need to b lidat ler...i'm sked to say hi to u now..

Ianfluenza said...

I have pretty much given up hope on searching for real meaning in asking those kind of questions. Just disregard them as this:

1st Person: Hi How ar you? (simply means Hello)
2nd Person: Fine thank you. (simply Hello back to you)

You do not have to struggle to give them a truthful question because 99% of them asking them do not have the intention or interest to really know how you are really doing. If they are really sincere, they will probe you further with more elaborated questions regarding how u feel...

me said...

dear wuching: *wink wink* don't be scared lah. hi only mah. i won't bite yet. only when you ask how are you without being really interested that you will get a very long pause from me, while i debate how to answer it. besides, my teeth has long been blunted. *grins*

everybody, see, got another tortured soul like me. i'm not the only perverted one mah. but this one has seen the light and knows the path to enlightenment. dear ian: thanks for the tip. still, i wish they won't ask if they don't want me to launch into the hour-long answer. coming from a friend, quite hypocritical mah. :-) i guess it's politeness so i shouldn't be so tough on them.

but i really value sincerity in a person. *looking down on the floor*

Robin CHAN said...

haha.. the conversation starters..

"how are u?
have u had lunch/dinner/supper?
when u getting married?
when u going to have children?
when your children getting married?
when u going to have gradchildren?

I am sorry, it is going to stay with u in your journey of life.

or u can reply like me:
"ok.. and what can I do for u?"

me said...

dear robin: and the best ones:

when you are in the shopping centre: hi, shopping ah?

when you are in the library: hi, finding books ah?

when you are in the restaurant, in the middle of putting that fork of spaghetti in your mouth, hi, eating ah?

when you are in coffee bean, with your friend: hi, talking to a friend ah?

*grins*

HappySurfer said...

I think this is universal. "How are you?" is ingrained into our system somewhat and it has become automatic that it gets blurted out first thing on the phone. I'm guilty too, at times.

Ian is right, it's actually "hello" and you "hello back" with "fine".

me said...

dear happysurfer: oh...in which case, hi happysurfer, how are you?

HappySurfer said...

I am fine. hehe..... (Not bad, we're actually putting it to practice.)

Las montaƱas said...

I get these..

"hello"
"Hello! where are you huh!?"

In the toilet lah, how to tell u!!